What is simply called "a fertility festival" in Japan would be referred to as 'a drunken mob parading a six foot long phallus down the main street of a tiny town' in the U.S. But it doesn't end there! There's also extreme amounts of mochi throwing (which is extremely hard and can leave bruises and welts like there's no tomorrow!), tonsssss of great phallus-shaped souvenirs (some as obvious as penis lollipops, and some merely suggestive, as in white chocolate dipped bananas!), fabulous food (I still wish I hadn't eaten the eyes!), and a plethora of entertainment available!!
If any of these wonderful things offend you, please read no further, and for goodness sake, *don't* view the photos below!!
So what am I talking about?? Good question! Last weekend I travelled four hours to the sleepy town of Komaki, along with every other Gaijin (foreigner) in Japan!! Wendell and I took a food lap first (we're always thinking!) and I immediately secured some lollipops for souvenirs, a white-chocolate dipped banana with a little chocolate penis on it (as if the banana isn't suggestive enough!), and some Okonominyaki (a kind of omelet with noodles, shrimp, bacon, vegetables, cheese, and some brown sauce). After the first crunch I realized I was actually eating whole shrimp, tails, eyes, and all! That didn't sit too well with your girl, but I ate around the bigger ones! It was quite good really!!
While we dined we got to see a Taiko performance, which was amazing!! Taiko are the huge Japanese drums that are also at the Japan pavilion in Epcot. Some of the children performing looked to be 5 years old! It was so cute!! They did a few different songs, and Wendell took a short video on his camera so please see below!
After that we wandered aimlessly, snapping pictures left and right, looking for a trash can (which are always impossible to find in Japan!), and letting our squid and eyes digest! Wendell just happened to glance another teacher we knew and it was all downhill from there! After about an hour of cell phone calls we realized that almost everyone I knew in Japan was there (minus two of my fave's, Nick and Daryn)! All seven of us got together, ate more suggestive foods, and just hung out and had an all-around amazing time!
Until two o'clock, which was when we had a ridiculously fantastic time!!! Why? Because that's when the parade started!! Hysterical! But the crowd was soooo enormous that we had to put Cris on Wendell's shoulders to get any decent pictures! She's light and he's incredibly strong, so no problems there!
A lot of my buddies here are from England and Scotland, so of course they needed an afternoon beer. Luckily, right across the street was a liquor store (dubbed Liquor Mountain, hahaha!) so the boys got their wish! I opted to stick to water and just sit back and enjoy the festivities! See the pics below for more of the story!
The Okonominyaki vendor. She seemed a little mad at life.
Ohhhh Taiko! I love you!!
We saw a sword demonstration. This guy was obliterating a thin piece of bamboo.
At least, I think that's what happened, LOL. I was actually too busy taking on and off layers because the weather was being bi-polar that day!!
My friend Ed, behind the lense.
My only suggestive photo...
Hey JAPAN necklace wearers: can you see that I'm wearing it?? =D
This very trusting stranger asked me to hold his camera lense. It was when they told me it cost about $1,200 that my hands started to sweat very badly. I was too scared to hold it, so I cradled it like a baby.
Shhhhh! It's sleeping!!
You laugh, but white chocolate covered bananas are DELICIOUS!!!
This guy was crazy! He wore this thing on his back and people posed for pictures with it (wayyyy more Japanese people did this than Gaijins!) and we didn't pose with it. Underneath the phallus was a sign that said "pull me here." That's just wrong.
While waiting for the parade to start, this great guy sketched a picture of Wendell and then gave it to him! Sweet, huh?
I wonder if it takes the man the entire year to carve these things??
If Japan, if you're hot, put a box on your head. It makes all things better!
Ed enjoyed his lolli! The one in his right hand is actually a vagina lolli. It was left over from the women's fertility festival the weekend before. This is both good and bad news. I jabbed at the guys that it does technically take both things to be fertile, but they didn't want to hear it! Stupid men!
There were wayyyy too many children there for my tastes. Notice, she has a lolli, too!
That parade stayed in one spot for almost twenty minutes (seriously!)!"Cris, we need a play by play! What's happening???"
"Here's the play by play: NOTHING!"
Just to give you a taste of the crowd!
Mike and Ayako! Couple since 2007 and so cute!
The nicest stranger ever! He had me hold onto his lense for him.
Right in front of Liquor Mountain. Hysterical!
Notice the kanji symbol on the red sign? That means "alcohol."
Thanks to Bruce it was the first Kanji I learned here.
This guy led the parade.
People pray to this thing (couples hoping for a baby, prostitutes hoping for a "clean year," etc.)!
Knowing the trains would be a bear, we decided to hunker down in the parking lot of Liquor Mountain for a few hours. Most everyone had a few more beers and played "fling the mochi." I'm the only person who hit an innocent stander-by. My bad!!
I <3 Ayako! She's so great! She's a real teacher at a real school (not a koushi like me!) =D
Ed, Mike, Wendell and I ended the night at a British Pub back in Nagoya. The guy in the pink sweater and the girl in front in white are newly weds... as in, they got married THAT DAY!
Wendell bought everyone a shot to celebrate.
Which reminds me, one of my students was trying to tell me that she thinks I must be a morning person because I have so much energy. But it came out like this:
"I think you're a morning person, because you look like a celebration."
BEST COMPLIMENT EVERRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
At the station saying good-bye! To be continued tonight, at Wendell's Welcome Party!
PARTY!! =D
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